I Have Waited Too Long to Settle Now

I saw a video tonight that asked, “Why are you still single? What are you waiting for?” What followed was a montage of exceptional love stories—people who seemed completely, joyfully, almost impossibly in love.

And my first thought was simple: I have waited too long to settle for mediocre love now.

I know I am only 30. There are people who have waited much longer to find their person, and I have no idea how much longer my own waiting will last. But I have come too far to give up at this point. I am already locked in. I might as well stay the course.

I do not want a relationship simply so I can say I have one. I do not want to accept whatever appears because waiting has become uncomfortable or because other people think my timeline should frighten me. I want the spark. I want the excitement. I want a love that feels alive, safe, mutual, and worth everything it took to arrive there.

I would rather learn how to be comfortable on my own for as long as I need to. I would rather keep appreciating my own company, building my own life, and becoming someone I am proud to live with than choose a connection that quietly asks me to shrink.

The difficult thing about settling is that you can usually feel it. Somewhere beneath the explanations and compromises, you know when you are trying to convince yourself that almost is enough. I do not want to spend my life negotiating with that knowing.

Waiting has not made me desperate for anything. It has made me clearer about what is worth waiting for.

So no, I am not turning back. I am not giving up. And I am not accepting mediocre love simply because extraordinary love has taken its time finding me.